So - [for today] I hate my iPhone. It reminded me today at 5am [in alarm form] which I'm quite sure, I just figured out how to set 3 months ago [?] - that today was the day I was due to deliver our second child.
Why is this so hard for me? I was only 9 weeks along. Nothing in comparison to what my sister and a dear friend of mine endured. [Which is why I almost didn't even write this.] I feel like a total wimp.
But feeling like a wimp hasn't stopped me from crying [more times than I'll admit].
I can't help but think of how different my life & way of life would be so different today. goals - natural childbirth [now running a marathon]. bedrooms - baby room [now a spare room]. purse - diaper bag [now designer bag]. etc. etc.
Sorry to be "Debbie Down-er" - I'm really not "down". Emotional? Yep, but I am most days. ;) It's just amazing to me to think of the priorities in my life now compared to what they would have been had I been delivering today. However, as I write this - I am realizing - this "wake up call" was actually a great thing that happened this morning.
Just wish I could tell my phone [should there be a "next time"] - that 5pm works just as well.