No. 384: It's not that we like the flowers themselves, it's that the flowers mean you're thinking about us. And we love that.
No. 494: We kind of wish we could chest-bump, too.
No. 154: Never underestimate the power of a kiss on the head.
No. 634: When we are truly angry, we go silent. That is your opportunity to apologize, or run. Neither will save you.
No. 584: "Business casual": Easy for you, but bewildering for us.
No. 374: Even we know this: The craziest girls are the ones who seem the most normal at first.
No. 495: We still like being asked on a proper date.
No. 841: Even if we look sad, don't tell us that we look depressed.
No. 934: Nothing is quite as comforting as a big, man hug. Safe, warm, firm, but yielding.
No. 455: We always want dessert. We always want you to order dessert. What we never want is for you to ask us if we want dessert. It's redundant.
No. 444: Replacing the roll of toilet paper counts as one of those "little things" that we love.
No. 914: Putting dishes in the sink doesn't count as doing the dishes
No. 417: No matter how much we love you we will never care what level you've gotten to in Call of Duty.
No. 204: "Chuck Norris would do it" is not an excuse for bad behavior.
No. 148: We like safe drivers. High-speed chases only impress us when they involve Jason Statham.
No. 724: We are really more forgiving after fights than we let on.
No. 472: In regards to shirt buttons, here's our advice: one open, you're fine, two open, you're cutting it close, three or more and you look like you belong on Tool Academy.
No. 946: It's true: We always want to be your top priority. Always.
No. 224: Electronics clipped to your pants are sexy only if you're Batman, Superman, or any other kind of man who needs them to save lives, not send e-mail
No. 249: We love hearing about your family. Even when it's boring, it's good to know you think about them
No. 847: When we slam the door, it means come in. Duh.
So now you [men] have no excuses.
Happy Freaking Monday.
;)
